Boundaries

oh em gee.
Good, Lord!
Jesus!

My words …
Those have been my words as He has spoken to me. I don’t mean them in vain. I mean no disrespect. I mean, “Oh, my God.” Yes, Oh, my God … I am listening. “Good, Lord ….” Yes, He is good … to remind me when I forget. “Jesus!” Yes, I hear you. Thank you for moving in my life.

Time and again, of late, I am in conversation with someone who asks me, “Have you read the book Boundaries?”  And the conversations are not all the same. I had not heard of the book when it was first mentioned to me. But, God made sure that I heard about it … over and over again.

I have been in a conversation about my marital relationship when the book surfaced in conversation. More than once it came up in connection to parenting my grown children. It has come up in reference to dating.  And other times, it was a general reference to some other situation. It turns out there are several books based on the same principles about boundaries in different relationships that include specific books on dating, marriage, kids and teens.

In my recent purging and cleaning , I have made the decision that I absolutely must clean out. If I am no longer to homeschool, then I do not need thousands of books and crates and closests of resources. And if God brings me back home to school to Joy-Bucket (yes … wonderful school yet,  she still continues to ask, “Mama, please bring me home), He will provide what I need at that time. So, I’m cleaning out.  Just a few weeks ago, I made a six crate (the max allowed intake per customer) sale to the chain store 2nd and Charles, a used book and electronics store. That week, I donated a total of 474 books on Tuesday and 576 books on Friday.  The second-hand store and Goodwill accepted the books and I was so pleased … though it was hard to watch so many wonderful books of dinosaurs, quilting and Bible reference leave my home. Most of the books were related to homeschooling and … well … this is just one more letting go. It is still difficult to watch the page turn.

Having made a sale to 2nd and Charles gave me some barter money. The first book that I requested in the store was Boundaries. Not only was there a hardback on the shelf, there was also a workbook alongside it.  oh em el. Yes, “Oh, my Lord,”  I thought. He really DOES want me to read this.  How exciting. A book to question my application of the principles. God knows my needs. He knows I can’t just read … I need direction and questions. Thank you, Lord, for a book to read and book to help direct my ponderings.

And so, I read. I read about boundaries. I read examples of people who do what I do … and people who I cannot relate to at all. But, I read. And I question and I ponder. I am jotting down answers and learning about boundaries.

It’s quite empowering. Some of the things I’ve read I know in my head … but feel powerless to walk out in my life. Reading is giving me courage that
my gut is right.
I need to stand up and do the best thing
and not fear being rejected.

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of friends who speak direction into my life
for books that I no longer need to trade for books that I do
and for the courage to read, dig and take action
to do the best thing …
rather than resting paralyzed in fear.
I am setting boundaries ….
I am up and moving …. and I am practicing falling ….  

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5 thoughts on “Boundaries

  1. Hubby had NO boundaries when we met. Not with his grown children, not with his grandchildren, not with me, not with other women (who wanted him to “rescue” them). Somebody else told him to read “Boundaries” and I’m glad it was not me. He hears certain things better from other people. I have not read the book. But whatever it said helped Hubby understand that boundaries are not a bad thing. He is completely different now, by God’s grace, not by something I did. And for all that he is hurtful in many ways, he is also a wonderful husband in many ways. I tell people that we are having “the full human experience” together – all of the good and all of the bad. We still fight a little when he sets a boundary with me – I am severely spoiled – but we get through it. I’m learning to not be such a brat.

    I hope that God blesses you through that book, Karen, in whatever way you need it the most.

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  2. How wonderful that God got the book to your hubby without your help. AND how wonderful that he read it! Many men won’t read!! That’s awesome!

    It’s so encouraging to hear how your marriage is growing and changing for the better, Carolyn. And I think it’s neat that you admit that you’re spoiled. To know that you are is half the battle … or at least a start to recovery.

    And I love your wording … that God would bless me through the book “in whatever way you need it most.” Such a nice thought. Because, He’s that way, isn’t He? He’s personal, specific and intentional. I tell you, I L ❤ VE God!

    {{hugs}}

    – |<@ren

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    1. Karen, I’ve really stopped asking God to give specific things to people unless they asked me to. I have no idea what you need and God does, so I make an effort to trust Him with that. I don’t know if you read the Deeper Story blog, but today’s post was about not knowing what is best for people. It’s an awesome read. Here’s the link in case you don’t get it: http://deeperstory.com/i-am-not-your-holy-spirit/

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