I miss her

The sunshine pours into her room, spills across her bed.
Her hollow room, empty and clean.
Her walls that echo of green and quotes.
I miss her. The kitty cats still go and sleep on her bed. She was their snuggler. When others in the family had no patience for night time visitors that might move or reposition themselves in the darkness, she had space.  And now, one of those kitties, she has taken on with her to her apartment. And the lone, forlorn Smudge continues to check. He goes in to nap. He snuggles there at night. He waits for her.

She does come back. She drops by to do laundry. She stops by to say “hello.” She comes in for a quick chat. She even drops by for a nap with the kitty.

Even if I wasn’t here when she came by, I can always tell if she has been here. Like sparkle dust that falls from a pixie’s wings, she drops bobby pins when she visits. It’s entertaining to me. She only wears a few when she puts her hair up for work. But, when she comes over, she leaves them. Bobby pins on the floorThey are on the carpet on her bedroom floor. The carpet that she bought at a yard sale with bartered babysitting time when we first moved to Augusta.

Bobby pins & coins

They are on the dryer,  mingling with change from tips at work and energy drink and chewing gum receipts from the gas station.Bobby pin - left behind by my sunshiney girl

And then there are those lonely pins that end up on the hall, kitchen and den floors.

But, she has left me sweet notes … notes that I won’t erase….
until they wear illegible.

They are on my mirror and the menu board that now lies too dormant … as there are so few mouths to feed now on a consistent basis that …. I wing it more than I plan. I’m happy for her.  She is doing well.  She has wonderful room mates.  She’s paying her bills on time. She enjoys her job.  She’s back in school. She’s having fun. She spends time with a guy that seems to be wonderful.

But, even with all the good … and the fact that this is all perfectly natural and healthy …

I still miss her.

I’m just sayin’ ….

4 thoughts on “I miss her

  1. We are on the road, heading east through Oklahoma toward home after spending nearly three weeks with our daughter and our three delightful grandkids. She hasn’t lived with us since 1994 and I never stopped missing her at unexpected moments during my day-to-day. Now, I miss the grandkids terribly after being with them so will spend the next several days consciously reminding myself how lucky I am to have them in my life and to be able to see them as often as we do. I remind myself to also be grateful for the “missing” when it’s so deeply based in love!


  2. This made me sad…
    especially about the notes. I didn’t realize.
    It made me start to cry…
    can I come home for dinner tonight?


    1. Yay! Of course, you can come to dinner! Whoohoo!
      And I don’t want you to “cry.”
      But, I do want you to know that I miss you.
      Especially when the sun pours through your windows and
      brightens your empty, clean room.


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